UPDATE 25MAR25: Told you so.
Let me make this absolutely clear: Albert Einstein, plagiarist of General and Special Relativity, was a drooling, stoop-headed, slack-jawed, mewling moron. And that’s on his good side. Anyone who peddles Einstein is a chiseler, shark, rogue, and opportunist.
One example? Einstein divided by zero and called it “infinity,” which is not a number. Thus, he created “black holes,” which can only exist in a universe with only one object. You and I sitting here proves Einstein was an idiot.
Just so we know where this is going.
Space, as in what the universe inhabits, is not a fabric. It can not be bent, bunched, folded, warped, or manipulated in any way. It is nothing more than a coordinate system that locates physical objects along X, Y and Z axes.
Time is not a “dimension” woven into the “fabric” of space. Time is a function of distance between coordinates at a given velocity and vector. If I travel between points A and B in a straight line at 1 mph, it will take a certain amount of “time”. If I travel the same distance, but I make loop-de-loops, back up here and there, and pause to observe females of the species, it will take much longer to travel between the exact same points.
It is also what we perceive as the separation between an action and a reaction. I say something to a female of the species, she slaps me; separation of action/reaction roughly one second. Sometimes she slaps me before I say anything, in which case I have travelled back in time.
Put simply, space is defined as “if it’s not one thing, it’s another”. Time is defined as, “I’ll be there when I get there”.
If I walk a mile in a straight line through sea-level air pressure, it takes me about 20 minutes. If I travel the same mile in a rocket at Earth’s escape velocity, it takes 144 milliseconds. I did not compress “space” or travel through “time”. I simply used an arbitrary and standardized set of metrics to measure the velocity (speed) and vector (direction) at which I travelled through a specified set of coordinates in a given medium (sea-level air pressure).
Seconds, minutes and miles do not exist in the universe. We made them up for our reference and convenience.
Gravity is not a force, particle or wave. It is the acceleration of attraction felt between charged or magnetized objects. Positive charges are attracted to negative. North poles are attracted to south. The “pull” between opposites is “gravity”. Weight is another arbitrary metric we made up to measure the velocity at which one object (me) is pulled toward another (female of the species) by opposite charge or polarity.
The late Wal Thornhill made Einsteinian “gravity” very clear. Einsteiners conceive of gravity as a bowling ball “warping” a rubber sheet. The problem is, that image requires “gravity” acting on the ball to “warp” the sheet. In other words, it uses gravity to explain gravity—a circular argument.
If I stick two magnets together, “escape velocity” is the kinetic force required to separate them. The more powerful the magnetic attraction is, the more force it takes to pull them apart. I can buy magnets the size of my hand that would crush my fingers flat with their “gravity”. Conversely, if I could force the same poles together (i.e. north to north), they would blow holes in a brick wall flying apart.
Don’t try this at home, trust me.
“Space” and “time” are systemic concepts we made up to measure the world around us. “Vector” and “velocity” are metrics we made up to convey line of travel and speed at which we move. We do not change the universe by measuring it. We simply apply rulers to it, and the rulers change in size based on certain physical qualities and environments. For instance, wood expands when it’s wet, and metal contracts when it’s cold.
“Time” does not compress or dilate based on velocity (speed). Astronauts and GPS satellites do not travel backward in “time” relative to someone standing on Earth.
Rather, the devices we use to measure time (rulers) function differently when the materials used to make them, or the physical conditions around them change. The vibrations of a cesium crystal sitting still at sea level are different from the vibrations of the same crystal moving at 17,000 mph in orbit. Simple.
If you run 10 feet in the air at sea level, you will travel much faster than if you try it in a swimming pool. Time and distance haven’t increased or decreased, but the resistance to movement along a vector increases in the water environment.
This is the fundamental problem with Scientidiots: they spend their whole lives making simple ideas very complex in order to justify sucking up our tax dollars by convincing us they are on to some seriously deep secrets of the universe.
I can prove them all wrong on my kitchen table with some magnets and some electricity. They are robbing us at gunpoint to play with mystical symbols to bamboozle productive people. I am playing with items I picked up at the hardware store with the exact same wallet.
At this point, we come to the “constant” speed of light. What absolute bunk. I can very easily prove light speed can change. Half-fill a clear glass with water and drop a spoon in it. POOF! You’ve just changed the speed of light. Go out in the desert on a hot summer day and look at the horizon line. POOF! You’ve just changed the speed of light. Get a high-powered telescope and look at an “Einstein Ring,” POOF! Same thing.
It’s called refraction, and it has exactly nothing to do with “gravity”. It’s the exact same principle as a camera lens.
Here’s where the real fun starts.
If “gravity” was a force, particle or wave, then according to the Einsteiners, it couldn’t travel faster than light. The Sun is 8-1/4 “light minutes” from the Earth, so the Sun’s gravity should take that long to “pull” on the Earth in any given moment.
In that 8-1/4 minutes, the Sun-Earth have moved roughly 113,850 km (70,750 miles) towards the Sun’s north pole and relative to the Milky Way’s galactic center. The Sun’s radius (half its width) is about 696,340 km (432,685 miles). Thus, the Sun-Earth have moved about a quarter of the Sun’s radius in the time it takes Einsteinian “gravity” to reach Earth.
According to Einsteiners, the Earth (and other planets) is constantly being pulled toward a point where the Sun was 8 or so minutes ago. Therefore, the Earth (and other planets) would have spiralled down into the Sun a long, long time ago.
The reason we aren’t all BBQ right now is because “gravity” is instantaneous, by any reasonable measurement system. That’s trillions of times faster than the “speed of light”.
Furthermore, “gravity” is an electro-magnetic phenomenon, similar to static electricity causing your socks to stick to your silk undies. If you want something to float or fly, just reverse the charge/polarity of the object using electro-magnetics. It will fly as fast as environmental resistance (water, air, vacuum) will allow.
The upshot of all this is, the universe is jam-packed with electro-magnetic fields. If you want to fly instantaneously to any part of the universe, you only need to carefully adjust your charge/polarity really really fast to navigate all those fields from point A to B.
You can vary the strength of your personal electro-magnetic field to adjust velocity (speed) and vector (direction). This is easily done with rotation, just like current spacecraft use gyroscopes to control attitude and vector, or generators spin copper coils inside a magnetic field to make electrical current.
Ever notice that every single thing in “space” rotates? There you go.
The reason Scientidiots and their handlers don’t want us to know any of this is simple: the universe is absolutely buzzing with free energy and instantaneous travel options.
If you could drive a pole into the ground and attach it to your house for free juice, there’s no means to control you. If you can zap yourself to Beta Reticulii for a twilight dinner on an alien beach and be home by curfew, you are way outside the cage. If you don’t need someone to interpret all those mystical symbols on the blackboard for you, there’s no excuse to dig through your wallet for “research” funding.
Sure, we’d still need to dig and refine raw materials to manufacture our flying saucers, and there is the little matter of high-voltage zero-point power packs, but the High Priests of Scientidiocy would become useless eaters overnight.
Yes, Einstein was a blithering mush-brain, but the folks promoting his drivel certainly aren’t. They are very good at swindling and grifting.
In short, we’ve been bamboozled with buffoonery and baffled with bullshit.
=====
Your pop culture assignment for today is the greatest sci-fi film ever made: The Adventures of Buckaroo Banzai Across the 8th Dimension (1984). Like Galaxy Quest, this film is so perfect they’ve never been able to make a sequel (thankfully). Every performance is poetry, the writing is sublime, the direction is inspired, and even the make-up is outstanding. This is John Lithgow’s greatest role ever. As Buckaroo reminds us, “No matter where you go, there you are.”
Chasing Red Lectroids on the Far Side:
E-book: Paper Golem: Corporate Personhood & the Legal Fiction
Contact Bernard Grover: bernard (at) radiofarside . com
Radio Far Side, published (mostly) every Sun/Wed at 7a CST/7p WIB, is a labour of love. We don’t use a paywall, and we don’t sell stuff. We just create things to inform and entertain. But like any good busker on the digital mean streets, we put our hat down and if you feel inspired, drop a coin in to show your appreciation:
BTC wallet: bc1qth6drgzcyt7vlxxpvqh6erjm0lmaemwsvf0272
XRP wallet: rMSQzLyE3RHacCLwYPADBbq4RHQ71HpCzw
Well, yeah. Einstein stole most of his bullshit from other scientists anyway. Einstein looked and acted like a genius. He was playing a role. Jews are very good at theater. Einstein also treated his women like shit. Not a good guy.
I actually feel smarter. Cheers mate!